Taoism: Shit Happens
Hinduism: This shit has happened before
Confucianism: Confucias say "Shit happens"
Buddhism: It is only an illusion that shit happens
Zen: What is the sound of shit happening?
Islam: If shit happens it is the will of Allah
Jehovah's Witness: knock, knock, shit happens
Atheism: There is no such thing as shit
Agnotism: Maybe shit happened and maybe not
Protestanism: Shit wont happen if I work harder
Catholicism: If shit happens, I deserve it
Judaism: Why does shit always happen to me
Televangalism: Send money or dhit will happen
Rastafarism: Smoke that shit!
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